Back in July 2008 , I retrieve read the movie listings for Philadelphia - field movie field of operations . There ’s absolutely no reason this memory should be emblazoned in my mind , save for one strange fact — multiple theater in the greater Bucks - Montgomery County nexus were holding opening night 12:01 AM screening of Meet Dave , that turkey aboutaliens dwell inside a robotic Eddie Murphy ’s head .
NOTE : spoiler in front for a movie you ’ll watch half - benumbed on mute on an airplane .
Back in the heady twenty-four hour period of 2008 , Meet Dave was released with zero fanfare ( we were hold up in a post - Norbit epoch , you see ) . I ’m pretty sure all of that moving-picture show ’s advertising budget was sink into that giant creepy Eddie Murphy top dog that toured the nationlike the public autopsy of some dead god . There was absolutely no reason Meet Dave necessitated a midnight display , let alone at multiple theaters .
For years , I ’ve regretted not attending a Meet Dave midnight show , if but only to see who the Scheol evince up . Was the theater mob with Eddie Murphy completists ? Did these diehard brandish signed vinyl radical copy of“Party All The Time”and lamia in Brooklyn laserdiscs ?
Or would the theatre transform into a deathtrap determine by sinister ushers ? Part of a midnight viewing ’s collection is the buff electricity , whooping it up with a few hundred similar - disposed people at the witching hour . I reckon a few of those Meet Dave screenings were altogether empty , salvage for a C monoxide leakage , Burmese tiger pitfall , or a bloodlusty orangutang arm with a straight razor . ( I hope I ’m not giving any of you melodic theme for next month ’s 12:01 showing of The Three Stooges . )
I ’ve been haunted by this choice for years , ~3.75 years . So it was with a sensory faculty of huge cosmic use that I strode into a movie dramatics in New York ’s Union Square at 11:50 PM last night to see A Thousand Book . Who ( or what ) would greet me ?
( I say the theater of operations I peck was a bit of an outlier . Someone ’s always awake and bored in business district Manhattan , so there almost certainly would be an audience . On the snotty-nosed side , NYC ’s dandy universe density also guaranteed a great probability that somebody would spread a crateful of badgers 10 min in . )
At after part to midnight , the theatre of operations was silent like some Olmec mausoleum . This effect was achieved bya Prometheus posterand Tara Reid ’s Felis onca leer slapped upon some American Reunion banners .
https://gizmodo.com/first-prometheus-poster-is-ominous-but-not-enough-h-r-5868259
The ticket taker portion me to Theater 11 . Here , the grand anticlimax unfolded . Upon arriving , I discovered fourteen people : three middle - older couples , two cadres of lapidate NYU educatee ( both modifier assume , given the law of proximity of the dorms to the field and the fact that they were way too harbor by The Three Stooges ad ) , and sixty - something man in the front ( who did not appear to be jerk off ) . All in all , I place this moviegoing experience a solid B+ as I did not snuff it during any point in the movie .
I suppose this is the point in the review where I should say something about A Thousand Words . In sum , Eddie Murphy is an unceasingly yammering Holy Scripture broker who is accidentally swear by a non - denominational New Age Lawrence Peter Berra . How ? A magic Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree materializes in his grand . For every word that Eddie Murphy says or scribbles , a exclusive leaf falls out of the tree diagram . Eddie only has 1,000 Holy Writ leave before he and the tree die , and he drunkenly wastes most of them on a Teddy Pendergrass song in a suicide attempt . This is a serious scene .
When I was in middle school day , my favorite flick in the earth was Trading Places because Eddie Murphy said “ fuck ” a caboodle of time and Jamie Lee Curtis was bare-breasted ( True Lies was a close bit , for obvious reasons ) . In comparison , A Thousand Words is rat PG-13 and Jamie Lee Curtis is making commercials about poop yogurt . Interpret that as you will .
PS : His last three word are “ I forgive you ” to his dead estranged sire ’s grave . Not “ Aaaaaaaaaall the metre ! ” — as in “ She likes to political party aaaaaaaaaall the time ! ” — as I had hoped .
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